The Empty Religions of Instagram: How Did Influencers Become Our Moral Authorities?
One way we can do good better is in how we treat ourselves. But I am profoundly dissatisfied with the messages shoved down our throats by “instavangelists”. If you read the above article, you’ll see many of them named.
The author writes, “I have hardly prayed to God since I was a teenager, but the pandemic has cracked open inside me a profound yearning for reverence, humility and awe. I have an overdraft on my outrage account. I want moral authority from someone who isn’t shilling a memoir or calling out her enemies on social media for clout.”
This quote is so important. Read it again. What are you yearning for? Is it: Be good to yourself! You are worth it (whatever “it” is)! Empowerment! Tell your truth! Abundance! Fluffy pillows! Healthy juice drinks!
Sure, sure. Treat yourself with kindness, you are infinitely valuable (because you are made in the image of God), be strong and do strong, and speak truth. Yes.
But the way many of these women, some of whom claim to be women of faith, preach their messages turns faith into self-care in the name of female empowerment. These messages bombarding us are froo-froo. They are weightless. They are self-serving. They idolize the self. They do not inspire reverence, humility, or awe. They do not come from women who have earned the right to speak with moral authority into our lives. At least not mine.
The women who have earned that right live close by or are on my “favorites” in my phone. They are my mom. I called her in tears this week and she held my heart and spoke truth and wisdom like only my mom can. They are L.N. here in Djibouti who has proven over 18 years that she is committed to me and my family through joy and pain. They are my private messaging friends who know aaaallll the darkness. We have walked through so many valleys and stood on so many mountain peaks, grieved with and cheered for each other.
These women don’t tell me to take a bubble bath and light a candle when what I really need is a hard look at my heart or attitudes or to plan out a challenging conversation. That said, they absolutely do tell me to take care of myself in other ways and at appropriate times (Lord knows I’m not taking a bath in our nasty cold-water tub in Djibouti!). They have poured my wine and passed me buckets of ice cream. They know me. They remind me that I am Beloved. They remind me to be humble. They point my eyes to the things that inspire awe - and truth be told, those things are not my Self.
Their message have meat on the bone. They speak truth that sustains. Not my truth. Universal truths. Like that I am chosen and beloved and made in the image of God.
Their messages turn me away from only self-care* toward other-care. Sometimes the best kind of self-care comes when our friends care for us - which means they are engaging in other-care. Which means we also must engage in other-care if we hope to bless our friends in their own self-care.
Back to the article, the author writes, “I find myself craving role models my age who are not only righteous crusaders, but also humble and merciful, and I’m not finding them where I live (online). Referring to the influencers who have filled the void religious faith has left for people like herself, she said, “They might inspire you to live your best life but not make the best use of your life.” (emphasis mine)
In other words, self-care has become a kind of religion for many, even for women who maintain their religion.
For both kinds of us: Get out of the screen, away from the instavangelists, and find friends who will kick our butts and also send emojis of themselves popping out of toilets with bouquets of flowers (other-care humor-style).
We need to stop making a religion out of our caring for ourselves and do what my religion calls for: taking care of others. Do to others as you would have them to do you. True religion consists of taking care of the widow and the orphan. Love each other, to the point of laying down your life (or rights, one might add).
In Blessed are the Peacemakers, Lisa Sowle Cahill writes, “Righteousness in God’s eyes is not narrowly interpreted purity and law-abidingness, but mercifulness effective in compassionate action. The “pure of heart” shall see God (5:3). The Golden Rule (7:12) urges the disciple to identify with the other, to perceive the other’s concrete need as though it were the disciple’s, to act toward the other as though the other were oneself.”
Don’t just live your best life. Make the best use of your life. One way to do this is by looking outward.
*I’m not saying ignore taking care of yourself. Often yes, that is the first thing we need.
I was just writing an essay on how this year of the 'Ox' is exposing so many idols in our lives as restrictions drag on and we fight harder and harder for our rights (especially Christians unfortunately) rather than asking the hard questions of what God would want to do with this time in and through us.
It's as if the self care practices people began in 2020 have now become a life vest for us that we declare we 'need' rather than questioning if this could be a time to actually deepen our trust in real, practical ways and go deeper with God.
And I stand first in line of the guilty. I have convinced myself that I need all these books, fluffy self-help sermons, and inspirational quotes to transform my mind but it becomes a slippery slope of addictions to improving myself rather than giving Him glory and living selflessly.
The sad part, in my own life and even in the social media world, sometimes service becomes another form of self help or a coping mechanism rather than truly doing it from a heart that loves God and others.
There is a quote in 'Irresistible Revolution' that says something along the lines of "But I guess thats why highlighters exist. So we can highlight the parts of the Bible we like and ignore the rest" in regards to people disregarding verses about the difficulty of the rich entering the kingdom of heaven, and emphasizing those that praise our own freedom and benefit for ourselves.
Anyway, thank you for having the guts to talk about the stuff that most people just want to ignore so they don't offend anyone. That is a real breathe of fresh air for many of us and you do it well and with grace. :)
So much yes to this paragraph.
"These women don’t tell me to take a bubble bath and light a candle when what I really need is a hard look at my heart or attitudes or to plan out a challenging conversation. That said, they absolutely do tell me to take care of myself in other ways and at appropriate times (Lord knows I’m not taking a bath in our nasty cold-water tub in Djibouti!). They have poured my wine and passed me buckets of ice cream. They know me. They remind me that I am Beloved. They remind me to be humble. They point my eyes to the things that inspire awe - and truth be told, those things are not my Self."